January – March Seed Catalog 2003


                      “CRAZY FOR GOD”


Christopher Edwards’ book by this title recounts his experiences with The Unification Church (a.k.a.) The Moonies.

Being “Crazy for God” was actually encouraged by those who indoctrinated him into the cult. It’s a phrase aptly

descriptive of modern religious extremism.


The nihilistic annihilators of 9/11, and others of their ilk, are inspired to commit suicidal acts of genocide in the

name of religion. Their sick piety is derived largely from the teachings of an executed Egyptian radical, Sayyid Gutb,

described by Paul Berman in the New York Times (3/23/03) as “Al Qaeda’s Philosopher.” Having studied in the US,

he had a long list of things he hated about our civilization, but what he hated most and what he taught must be

eradicated by any means necessary, however horrible, was the separation of church and state. And yet, the

realization of his philosophy through “divinely sanctioned “ atrocities, such as the assassination of Egyptian President

Anwar Sadat and similar instances of suicidal genocide, illustrates tragically and exactly why the separation of faith

and state is so necessary and desirable!


When it comes to our own religious fanatics, we tend to be dismissive or amused when they, for instance,

vociferously demand that we put God and Bible reading back in school. Or, when they really do go “Crazy for God”

and murder people because of their beliefs, there is a tendency, even then, not to be critical of their religion. There

is a general assumption that any religion is better than none at all and that all passion, even passionate desperation

and violence, are understandable within the context of someone’s religious belief. David Koresh, of Waco fame,

for example, gained many sympathizers because they thought, “at least he stood up for what he believed”

– never mind that what he believed was completely insane and that it resulted in ultra-abusive coercion and

unholy terror. -- Bill Joyner





My favorite authority on work is Claudia Shear, author of BLOWN SIDEWAYS THROUGH LIFE. In a blistering

satire, she critiques the roughly sixty odd jobs she held and/or abandoned while her own dream of being a

performer was put on hold. By transforming her work experiences into a remarkable book and then into a

successful one-woman play, she perfectly demonstrates how to “make a medicine of the illness.”


Through it all -- the labor, the humiliations the compromises, the achievements and, of course, the paychecks

-- we work in order to survive, whether we work for someone else of for ourselves. Most of us need the stability

and the satisfaction that comes from having some kind of a job; and at times our job is just working through a

transition and finding another job – probably the greatest challenge of all, managing the opportunities and the

dangers of a full-blown life crisis. Me, I’m a great believer in continuing some kind of a paying job, no matter

what else is going on. It could be “stop loss” work, an interim job, whatever there is to do. If nothing else,

it keeps you in practice. And as much as I hate searching the want ads and filling out applications, even that

is good practice. As for self-employment, all I can say is that we’ve all got our own demons to face there,

because we’re on our own, no one to blame – unless you can afford to hire someone or otherwise convince

them to share the load.


One more piece of useless advice: Let’s say you’re working with or for someone else – first and foremost,

respect them and strive for the achievement of mutual goals. If there is a personality conflict which cannot

be worked out in a professional manner, complete your current work thoroughly, without rancor or complaint,

and plan for a more compatible arrangement elsewhere. Our best work is always done when there is mutual

trust and respect.

                                                  -- Bill Joyner




My own work history has been varied and chaotic, emulation is not suggested. Nevertheless, I can offer some

insights from my experience in the world of work.                                        



Having slept off a 16 - hour watch at L’Ambiance, Penny and I went walking. Then I went to New College,

dropping off 2 bikes for repair and tanking up on expresso at The Four Winds Café. The pure delicacy of orchid trees

blooming on a full moonlit night reminded me of virgin love.  – BJ


Saturday, March 22, 2003


The world is at war with itself – again. Troops advance through sands of exotic mystery. Children are in deep distress.

All are excited and fearful of ominous change. Some are mad as hell that the conflict is going so relatively well

– the ones who hate George W. Bush.


Lust is a rush. Love takes its time, possessing the courtesy and the patience of restraint, as in the concept that we are

constrained by the love of God. -- BJ

2-17-03                                                                                 March 21, 2003

2-17-04                                                                                        ‘bout 8 PM

2-17-05                                                                                 in my front yard

2-17-06                                                                                         at 731 42nd St. in

2-17-07                                                                                          Sarasota, Florida


                                A CINEMA CIRCUS CELEBRATION






2-17-13                                                      This is where we begin, listening to # 4 cut on Madonna’s CD “Music.”

So sweet, so real! For the numbers, Bill, you know how to count what matters.

Self-doubt always was your nemesis, but I’m not complaining, even about that.

Your life, it’s a dear wonder to me, you know, even now, bordering upon my 69th birthday.

We are all a unity -- with ourselves, with each other, with divinity and reality.

We are one and the same, yet completely unique.                                                                                                   





2-17-18                                                                                                                                          How I was Numbed out by Numbers


Excerpts from                                                                                             HOW CAN WE COMMIT THE UNTHINKABLE?

By Israel Charney and Channon Rappapor



Just as I was falling in love with words, I fell out of love with numbers. Just barely passed math in high school,

vowing never to tangle with any more useless equations. Almost immediately, I paid the cost, being told in the Navy

that my math scores were too low to qualify me for going into the area of my first choice, aviation photography.

Nevertheless, I just sort of coasted along with this persistently erroneously notion that numbers didn’t matter,

avoiding them in college by opting for science courses instead, assuming that my chosen field, religion, had

nothing to do with figuring anyway. But again, I figured wrong. After being in the ministry for awhile, a good

friend invited me to teach philosophy in his place during a summer session at Christopher Newport College

in Virginia. There, I rediscovered, in grappling with the reasoning of Descarte and other seminal thinkers,

that mathematics is inextricably related to our understanding of the universe.   -- BJ